Tuesday, May 24, 2005

too many things to write and i cannot think any other way that is better, well, blogging is about writing and the materials that you write down, so i think its fair enough just to enlist them.hehehe.some of the times, the starting lines of the posting just tangled you aightt???
one.
my movie's preview has been so not fun. i was tied with a distressing fact that some people really want to brag about something.i just dont like the way they act towards the event. it was supposed to be a together show, not apart.the hell i care, i just enjoy people who enjoyed my movie. it made me more comfortable to have another one in production before i turn myself to the next pedro almodovar. huahahahahahah. dream on. nopes!!i guess i will take the risk. any comment out there? talk to my hands, i am already fixed with my selfishness and dont really care about WHAT you have in mind.
two.
um...si manis just screwed up my movie with her/his somewhat true critics...well on everything. sorry andika for putting your story so low that i lost the soul of your so sad post. but, this far i know i can make people laugh, and i know i have the bites to tell a comical movie.huehehehe.
three.
eventually i enrolled myself (again) on the comunity service program.arrgghhh...leganya.what a relieve, i have many things in mind for this one.
four.
this past few weeks i follow the continuance of smallville (you know, that superboy soaps?) and guess what, i got so bored with things that happening between lana and clark.hahaha. suddenly i drop my thoughts to indonesian soaps. things are not so different at all.
five.
getting drunk was so hillarious.

thats it. for now. enjoy.
you know what, actually i got many pics for you guys to see...just wait kayy??

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 8:34 AM [comment]

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Sunday, May 15, 2005

calling all ye movie freaks!!
unhappy birthday premiere
friday 20th of May 2005
room K.18, 2nd floor
kampus 1, mrican
Sanata Dharma University

also showing:
shounji
happy birthday

its all free!

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 1:10 PM [comment]

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Monday, May 09, 2005

good looking and bad looking (and some notes of today)


just now,i went to a book store. alone. most of the times i just cant go alone. i cant bare the loneliness and the thought of wondering places on my own. i am not the guy who likes to be alone. but this time i tried to beat my loneliness, well somehow there are moments when you just have to be alone and share your times with your own sanity and thinking about stuffs that you have done.aightt? so whats the deal with the title?
okay, i walked to the highest floor on the building and browsing the books, who knows that i might drop my sight to the kind of books that i like and i have the desire to have it. FYI, i just bought mrs.dalloway by virginia woolf and da vinci code by dan brown last week (the time when dad came and he went to a book store to buy some books, so i decided to add his bills with those books.hahaha).
so there was me, on the top floor. looking around.i walk here and there for couple of minutes, observing some fresh edition of my fave mags (but did not have the intention of buying it). as usual, i could not stand some kind of music that made me shiver to move (suddenly i caught the sound of Justin's like i love you) so there was me, again, shaking my butt to the rythm of that song. i guess some people out there, near by me, must have veen entertained by my private dance show. okay, back to the title.
suddenly, i passed my sight on this person. the person's name is disguised to be A.A is cute. really cute. my heart says something to see A. A is in my list of loveable person (you know, the kind of person that i want to love and be loved in return). A has everything. A would pass all my need from a person.A was so cool standing on A's own. and i looked at A from a far. sigh. i just rub my chest to know that i cannot have A. my mind just wondering around with the thought of having A.on my own.
then suddenly my eyes caught a sight of B.i met B just some of the times. but B is quite, you know...everywhere.B is also my type. but A was a bit stocky. there you go. and B was...tall but skinny. but B got the look. got the eyes and got the smile, got the chin.yumm.hhahahaha.
the title, why there should be the standard that says A and B are the type of cute persons? cute is when someone has the right bones? right eyes? proportionate body parts? the right skin? what else is right on them? why when I saw them i suddenly labeled them CUTE. whats cute all about? whats cute actually? and why these cute people most of the times have the bigger potentials from the so called ugly people to be on the hot spots. you know, good jobs, big paid.
whats God to do by creating and putting the standardized CUTEness to our awareness.in our dictionary of minds? do some people out there really care about cute and ugly people. and most of the times, in love, cute people are so unfair. they choose the so called cute people also to be in love with. and they justify that ugly people cant have them. then, cute people are only for cute poeple. and ugly people can only watch good looking people together.
there are this couple. i noticed them some of the times.frankly speaking, using the standardized cuteness...they are not the kind of good looking people. (see i am already using this term, i am so aware of the term that i am being unfair and suddenly i used it on them.sorry). but they are, everytime i see them, so in love. i could see that they need each other. they happy for each other. and it seems to me that each of them wont find the new one to be in love with. voila...this is a new thought.
ugly people realize that they have a small chance to be in love due to their well...not so good looking feature.so when they grab one they wont let it go and treat the one they already got as the possessions, well...for the rest of their life. you know, the thought that they cant always be in love.and they are lucky enough now to be in love thought.
while the so called good looking people...they know they have bigger chance in love, they can love the not so good looking people and the so called good looking people too. they have bigger choices and alternatives, cause they are good looking. so they tend to be pragmatic in relationship. they tend to easily let go their partner, any time. dump one and get another one. that easy.
not so good looking people, like me, cant do that. pity on us. what should not so good looking people do to struggle for love? cause in the end only not so cute people will also fall for not so cute people. cute people only belong to cute people.hehe.bitter huh.
why i write this?
this is just my stream of consciousness. my father said that there are ugly people and good looking people cause there are good and bad, and they complete each other. world wont stand in balance if there are only good looking people around. good looking equals to perfection, and when perfection is all around it would be probably boring. so some mistakes are needed to put new colors into perception.
i think, logic is useless when you think about these terms: cute and not so cute.i mean,i wonder who put the term in use for the first time.
should one pity themselves cause they dont have the look? many people would commit suicide if so. my stream of consciusness told me that the world's condition has been so justified with many terms in practice which are so unfair. but again, unfair completes the term fair.


today?
me and khrist decided to launch our movies together.next friday, the 20th of may 2005. about 6pm.we wrote this letter to be given to the department tomorrow.
khrist is a problematic person, for me, too.well...this far,i can tolerate...

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 8:21 PM [comment]

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Saturday, May 07, 2005

the sms that i got that morning was a warning. my father came here. yesterday.it was a surprise for everyone. and we were like, busy...hiding things. well, actually it was not that bad. i am glad that he still tolerate my indisciplinary attitude towards my thesis. sigh. i am not relieved myself.i am not happy myself to witness my goofing around habbit and tendency not to focus.shame. shame.sigh. again. anyway, as usual dad never stays too long when he visits us. i guess he wont let us spend his money, like a lot. but we always buys something when he is in town. and i know that my time is ended already for stuff like that. and again, he spilled me with stuffs that my ears would be hot enough to hear.and i know that he was and he is true.suddenly it slips in my mind..this kind of situation is the kind that i will face in the future.you know, about father and son things.but i already told myself not to be a forcing father, you know...the kind that demands your kid to do this, do that, dont do this, dont do that.i will let my kid do anything that they want to do with their life, as long as thats cool enough with themselves, the world, their surroundings, and their God.cool already? hehehe.
anyway, last night i left the hotel where my dad stayed (he left home this afternoon by plane directly to Pontianak) to visit a music gathering by some electronic artist. the crowd was cool. but the music was riotic. and the people later turned to be riotic either.fuck. i was trying to enjoy my time. again, the drum and bass session left me earlier cause i was late. duu huuu. the music was around the sounds of the 80s with many samples from the cure and many other cool tunes that i could not figure out, but the music was so cool.i noticed a Dj. his name was durga, he came from bali. and he played such a cool session for everyone. he knew how to maintain his grip on our addicted mind for music. we went crazy so many times on behalf of his music. hahahaha.but after that, the crowd went crazy and i escaped myself out side.its riotic enoufh for me...so i just got my fingers on my Marlboro lights and smoke.sigh. what a night. i met many new friends there, and some old friends.
okay, what do i left to tell? ummm...well i got some new rubber bands. you know, the ones that is so happening at the moment? i bought a shirt and got myself the right to buy rubberbands.yellow, orange and green.just cute.




anyway...please check my photo album, cause i have uploaded new pictures which were taken a year ago.remember when i wrote about my trip to borobudur? yeah, these new images were taken at that particular time..it took me like ages until i can put it here...it was nice, the whole family on a one day trip and we were so tired by the end of the day...these are some of them, you can check more of it here.
nice weekend everyonee...go rent movies, to the mall, be brats, sip some coffees, use your fire wire...be everywhere...this is weekend, enjoy your time, dont let it pass you just like that!

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 4:04 PM [comment]

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Friday, May 06, 2005

i woke up this morning and received an sms from my father.

father: son, when will you graduate?

son: ...

i was waking up from a very nice sleep. it was 5am in the morning, and i drop my eyes onto the incoming message.i could not continue my sleep.i quickly took my bath and went here. i am going grizzly. he made me so awful about myself,all of a sudden. there are many people out there who are...proud enough to fight their father. i am probably one of them. but its sadder,even more, for me, to know that up to now, i still cant make him happy of what i am doing for my life.
all the way here, i suddenly think how happy he was when he had me the first time on his hands. on my way here,i saw a young father with his cute little son. they sat next down to the dirty river of mataram ditch,a current that passes their house.i wonder, did my father take me out in the morning when i was so small, greet the morning.
i wonder if he was very happy to have me for the first time, and now all i can do is piss him off.
God, please dont make me waste his love for me.

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 6:42 AM [comment]

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Thursday, May 05, 2005

what should one do when they face such a twisting story of life? i guess when people are aware to this kind of thing then they would treat their life like a...well, shit hole. i mean, have you ever met someone that, you know, feel their life is not going anywhere. stuck and they better dead then alive? sigh. that kind of people surely have a very dramatic life, therefore...there is this term...drama queen. someone who miserably consider their life like in TV soaps. i mean, somehow her life or his life (cause there is always the drama king) has this similarity to the TV soaps. troubles. ups and downs. tears and laughs. i mean, normal life would be probably consists of those things too, but are there actually people who treated those things like they are so big? have i met a drama queen lately? well, last 2 years i was having such friend.and she was like trouble some everywhere.enough of that. she's not the kind of person i want to remember. she is still a friend though.
i wrote this one cause today i am so dumb that i dont know its holiday. yes dear. i was dumb struck to know that this is a holiday.shoot.
so now i drop myself to the net and back again, buzzing things around. sigh. many people out there asked me, well..what makes me so addictive to this thing. i dont know what and how i should explain but i feel the thrill of this untouchable world. can you? i feel like falling from a point to a tunnel of no end and where each sight i make would sucked my brain into whole new perspective.isnt that cool. just a sight and you can learn things. and up to now, i cant imagine if i have to live without the word 'online.' and now, i drop myself to a porn site, well...2 porn sites. which i was not, i mean, not visiting like for ages...
i like these 2. unlike any other sites who conventionally follow the old pattern of porn, in a sense that well, i need sites who moderately put images into categories like 'i wanna **** you like an animal.' how cool is that? hjahahahah. i found such cathegory here...and well, the images in that categorys said so. i wanna bang you like an animal. hahaha. well, i am still buzzing those sites while writing this...imagine...
FYI, last night was YOga's birthday...we buzzed around and drop our ass to DR.again. well, previously we went to see a rap competition.many cool competitors. stylish rappers and well...average. but some are just cool.erno was cool.yeah, erno was there.we went like with berto, erick, me, yoga and....well just four of us. but later we split and the one that went home together was just me, yoga, and chandra.
they are friends who i just used to see from a far. now they are this close.
i guess i need new circle of friends, not that i would leave the one i have now. but most of the times i think that i need friends who i can really evolve with, and if these new guys i met just these 2 days can bring the sphere that i want in a friendship well...thats just cool.
now, i am blank...i dont know that today is holiday...and i still want to revise my thesis. where should i go? should i rent some movies?....sigh...lame.

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 9:04 AM [comment]

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Sunday, May 01, 2005

i feel like i owe some stories. for everyone who come here and mind their thoughts to buzz on some of my craps.its like hell, but to be honest dude i dont have any mind of stories right now. the thing is i might be too depressed to relate myself to a scenarion and eventually write down the details of it, or probably just a bit of it here. well, week end was the moment when expectation of a bright saturday night comes to mind. but wait, there is another alternative ending here i am saying. too recap, saturday was betty's graduation and some of my other not so close friends were graduated too. felt happy for them yet felt awkward and sad to myself.i bonk a lot i suppose. i went here and there and missed lots of things. i spent the saturday night alone, well nope...wrong memory card. i went to see a show on UGM and ended dissapointed because the DJ whom i wanted to see has gone to tawangmangu and played there, and i missed that cool show. fuck.the show on UGM itself somehow ended when that cool band stop playing, everyone was just gone suddenly and i was stranded there waiting for a DJ to play and when one DJ appeared from the dark he played a lame tune and that lame people goofing around acting like so cool while i was watching them like a pathetic asses, like i care what i did. i did care, if i didnt why i wrote it down here. darn. those were not the kind of people who enjoyed DJ. they better listen and dance to something else. fuck them.
okay, another week is starting here, or about to start. next week means:
1.catching up with my finale thesis.
2.start to edit my movie.
3.put the poster everywhere. anyway, i buzzed my saturday night by creating the movie poster for my second project.it was fun...
4.call my boss in Jakarta and tell him i had enough with his ignorance.
5.start to write my own stories and sell them quick.
6.arrange the premiere for my movie.
this far...these are my thoughts at the moment...sigh. do you care anyway what i wrote down here?

stanley dirgapradja@petit garcon 10:31 PM [comment]

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